Custom Roast Songs — The Ultimate Stitch-Up

Funny. Petty. Ridiculously specific. Just like your mate.

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Burns, Bangers & Banter — All in One Song

Roasting your mate? We’ll turn their worst habits and funniest fails into lyrical gold.

Nothing says "I love you, idiot" quite like a personalised roast song. Whether it's a birthday, bucks night, promotion, or just because they finally learned to parallel park, we take your inside jokes, embarrassing stories, most roastable traits, and turn them into a hilarious, studio-quality track.

No templates. No mercy.

We’ll include nicknames, dodgy fashion choices, bad tattoos, weird hobbies, and that one time they cried during a Marvel movie. You send us the ammo, and we’ll deliver a song that absolutely ends them (in the nicest way possible).

Perfect for: Birthdays, Best Men, Bosses, Breakups, and Big Egos.

Roast Someone Who Deserves It

How it works

  • Tell us about the roast victim

    Don’t hold back. The worse, the better.

  • We write & record the burn track

    Our lyricists are savage.

  • (Optional) Approve the lyrics first

    Or let it be a surprise and risk friendship.

  • You receive your song

    In MP3 format - ready to ruin lives, lovingly.

What to Include in Your Song

Make it personal. Make it savage (with love).

We’re turning your mate’s misadventures, bad habits, and questionable life choices into a one-of-a-kind roast track. So don’t hold back. This is a loving takedown - the more brutal (and true), the better.

The goal? Humiliate them gently. Or not so gently. It’s your call.

Need some ideas to get started? Try this:

  • 😂 Iconic Fails

    • That one time they epically embarrassed themselves
    • The inside joke no one will let them live down
    • A list of things they should never be allowed to do again

  • 🧠 Personality Flaws (We Mean, Quirks)

    • The weird phrases they always say
    • That hobby they take way too seriously
    • Questionable fashion choices, cooking skills, or driving record

  • 📱 Everyday Roast Material

    • How they act in the group chat
    • Their chaotic dating history (names optional… or not)
    • The reason you’d nominate them for “Least Likely to Succeed… Yet Somehow Did”

  • ❤️ But Seriously…

    • Why they’re your ride-or-die (even if they’re a menace)
    • What makes them one of a kind
    • The stuff you’d never say to their face (until now, in song form)

Whether it’s for a birthday, bucks party, wedding, or just because you can, we’ll help you create a funny, brutal, and surprisingly heartfelt roast song your mate will never forget (and probably never forgive).

They’ll laugh, they’ll cringe, they’ll play it on repeat.

This is not your average custom gift. This is a roast in rhyme.

Songs So Personal, They Hurt (In a Good Way)

Inside jokes. Embarrassing moments. Unfiltered banter. We turn your mate’s greatest hits (and misses) into a custom song they’ll never live down - but will secretly love.

Make ‘em cry… from laughter. Start your roast song today.

Roast Review

"Honestly, the roast song was brutal. It mentioned his Tinder fails, that time he got kicked out of a paintball arena, and even the fact he still uses Hotmail. The lyrics were hilarious, but also weirdly catchy. Everyone was in stitches. 10/10, would emotionally scar a mate again."

— Tom & the boys